7 Signs You Are Wasting Your Time Trying To Get Your Ex Back(Most Obvious)

10 minutes read

Why waste precious time and moments trying to come back to your ex when you can walk over such a relationship and find someone better? Yes, indeed, a breakup in a relationship always leaves one or both partners heartbroken, even when the reasons are worthwhile. Because there’s always a feeling of loneliness and emptiness in the heart, which takes a lot to fix.

However, you can’t keep repeating the cycle when the signs that you are wasting your time trying to get your ex back are written all over.

Furthermore, while some relationships can be rekindled, there are situations where getting back to an ex might not be fruitful. Have you sat down to scrutinize the reason for the breakup, or did you just act on the impulse to please your emotions?

It’s obvious your ex is displaying a lack of interest, and your ex no longer cares if you exist or not. These signs show you are wasting your time trying to get him back. Your ex is your former partner, which should have nothing to do with your present.

I understand the feelings and how you’ve tried to get over him, but your tricks aren’t working. It can be frustrating to realize you have been giving your love to the wrong person and wasting your time. However, in this article, we’ll be focusing on the signs you are wasting your time trying to get your ex back and how you can forget your ex and push on in life.

7 Signs You Are Wasting Your Time Trying to Get Your Ex Back

All these signs are very obvious and easy to dictate to any individual. Why do you think you can’t move on without your partner in your life when your partner has forged ahead in life and forgotten you once existed?

Several individuals want to get back into their past friendships because they feel that they’ve invested so much in them to just let it slide. They feel their partner is the only perfect one for them, and they feel they can cope with the friendship no matter the challenge.

However, you need to know that breakups don’t happen for no reason. Trying to get back to your ex can be so difficult. Let’s delve into the signs you are wasting your time trying to get your ex back.

1. Lack of mutual interest


RDNE Stock project, Pexels

Misunderstandings are indeed bound to happen in any relationship. However, when both parties (partners) are still genuinely interested in a relationship, whether romantic or not, reconciliation becomes the only solution that will be very feasible to achieve. Furthermore, when one partner is no longer interested in the relationship, reconciliation becomes very difficult to achieve.

When there is a mutual interest between both partners in any relationship, you will notice that there is a joint effort in rebuilding trust, commitment, and repairing the relationship because they are the bedrock on which a successful relationship stands.

Have you considered reconciling with your ex if it is not working in your favor? You’ve tried over and over again to get back to your ex, but you feel frustrated because it’s a one-sided effort from you alone. You noticed that your ex rarely initiates contact and frequently delays responding to your messages, shows no effort to meet with you, and always shows mixed feelings (acting like they are interested today and acting otherwise the next day).

They avoid discussing past issues because they aren’t interested in reconciliation or pursuing other relationships. These are red flags that indicate you are wasting your time trying to get your ex back.

What do you do when your ex display lack of mutual interest, which is one of the signs you are wasting your time trying to get your ex back?

Your ex might decide to accept you back out of pity, which won’t last for long, so you are advised to cut off from your ex and stop budging your ex with apology messages.

2. Varied relationship objectives and personal integrity

Have your ex got varied relationship objectives and personal integrity for you? Having different relationship objectives and personal integrity makes both partners walk on different pages in life, which can lead to different issues such as disagreement, quarrels, apathy, and fighting. Which signifies that both partners are not compatible.

Having the same relationship objectives and personal integrity is important because when partners oppose themselves in a relationship, it signifies that there’s no love and they are romantically detached.

However, when your ex disagrees on salient relationship matters such as marriage, having children, and getting a job after marriage, it’s a sign that your ex doesn’t want you back, and you might be wasting your time trying to get your ex back.

Your ex might already have a mental picture of what he wants, which you can’t fit into. Therefore, making an effort to fit into that picture might end up fruitless, which is one of the signs you are wasting your time trying to get your ex back.

However, if your ex is communicating with you but has made it clear they want a different kind of relationship from what you are expecting, it’s an indication that you might be wasting time because it won’t work. While you might get along well with your ex, it seems your connection can only remain at the level of mere friendship.

3. Your ex is entangled in a fresh relationship

This is one of the notable and obvious signs you are wasting your time trying to get your ex back. In this scenario, your ex has moved on; he’s engaged in a new and committed relationship.

But you might still think of giving it a try and asking your ex out. It’s possible to gain your ex’s attention after all; they might still love you. Your ex might be in that new relationship not because they love the new partner but because they felt lonely, which spiked the need for a new relationship.

However, if your ex loves the new partner more than you, it means they have moved on, which is a clear sign you are wasting your time trying to get your ex back.

4. Lack of communications

Have you noticed your ex’s number isn’t connecting? It might imply that they’ve blocked you to avoid any form of communication.

You discovered your ex blocked you on other social media platforms as well. Well,  you might think they are acting on impulse and they’ll unblock you soon. However, the reverse might be the case.

The reason they blocked you is clear: they don’t want to talk to you at the moment, which can extend to hours, days, weeks, months, and even years. Once communication breaks down, it leads to misunderstandings because you’ll most likely rely on assumptions instead of understanding each other’s feelings.

However, there’s a solution to this: either you will be patient while they unblock you or you just have to move on, accepting the fact that they don’t want you any longer.

Furthermore, you might be patiently waiting for your ex to unblock you only to discover that they’ve moved on, which is one of the signs you are wasting your time trying to get your ex back. As John Powell said, communication works for those who work at it. Communication has to come from two sources for words to be conveyed.

6. Lack of personal growth

Growth and self-improvement after a breakup are very important, as they will help individuals cope, heal, and become more resilient when faced with difficulty.

However, self-discovery, building confidence, improving emotional intelligence, building healthy relationships, independence, and personal fulfillment are signs of personal growth.

How do you know that there’s a lack of personal growth? When you are rehashing old arguments, stalking on social media, dating the same type, lacking self-reflection, jealousy, possessiveness, avoiding accountability, and going into new relationships immediately,

Furthermore, getting back to your ex without personal growth will lead to the same issue that caused the breakup. When there’s a lack of change, your ex may continue to exhibit the same behaviors that led to the breakup, which are signs you are wasting your time trying to get your ex back.

7. Trust issues


Keira Burton, Pexels

Trust is one of the keys to every successful and healthy relationship. Other aspects of relationships are built on trust. Trust is important in every relationship because it ensures emotional safety, effective communication, reliability, vulnerability, mutual respect, longevity, security, and intimacy.

However, when a relationship lacks trust, such a relationship can become draining, distant, and unsustainable.

Once trust is broken, it’s sometimes difficult to amend it. Your ex might have persistent doubts and fears, making it difficult to find trust again, even if you are truly sorry and committed to change. Issues like repeated cheating, habitual lying, betrayal of sensitive information, and lots more can cause trust-related issues.

Have you noticed your ex always questions your movement, monitors you, and prefers to video call you to know who’s around you?
That’s a sign that your ex doesn’t trust you, and you’ll be wasting your time trying to get back to your ex when there are trust issues.

Final Words

Reading through these signs that you are wasting your time trying to get your ex back will help you in your healing process. Look out for these signs, and be intentional about moving on, making progress, and changing to become a better person.

Don’t waste your time trying to come back to your ex who is no longer showing interest; build yourself, and don’t be so eager to get into another relationship out of loneliness without dealing with and healing from your past relationship.

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