How-to-Deal-with-Breakup-When-You-Still-Love-Them

Damilola Aturamu

How to Deal with A Breakup When You Still Love Them: 18 Practical Steps

Dating Tips For Men, Dating Tips For Women, Love and Relationship

Breakups, especially when both parties still have feelings, can be agonizing due to reasons like distance, communication issues, or differing futures. Despite the pain, healing occurs over time. The possibility of remaining friends might exist.

A breakup can damage self-esteem and cause loneliness. Coping and emerging stronger is possible, even though it seems daunting. During times of such vulnerability, prioritizing mental health might seem challenging. Analyzing what went wrong Ah, the universal post-breakup ritual. But remember, emotions aren’t mathematical equations.

Blaming yourself is like blaming a star for fading; sometimes, it’s just part of the cosmic dance. Life can feel suspended, dreams shattered. The inclination to analyze mistakes is strong, but it’s subjective and can lead to self-blame.

Dearest, let’s embark on a heartfelt journey through the labyrinth of breakups. Ah, the bittersweet symphony of love and separation. Yet, even as tears flow and hearts ache, there’s a whisper of hope—the possibility of healing and growth, which are the goodies packaged in How to Deal with a Breakup When You Still Love Them.

Amid the pain, don’t forget to cradle your mental health like a fragile rose. It’s like nurturing a garden, allowing it to flourish even after a storm. Dearest, remember that every ending carries within it the seed of a new beginning. As you navigate this labyrinth, know that healing is your compass, and love—for yourself and the intricate tapestry of life—is the guiding star.

Guess what? From the statistics on breakups, the success percentage of long-distance relationships is 58%. Long-term relationships are less likely to end in divorce, according to statistics on adult breakups. One of the main causes of divorce is an inability to communicate effectively. The length of the relationship affects your chances of winning your ex back. In 2018, 72% of respondents claimed their partner had ghosted them, and 65% admitted to ghosting someone else.

Loving an ex intensifies this emotional turmoil. Not all breakups are equal; separations when feelings remain are particularly distressing. Sometimes parting is the only resolution. Steps to navigate a breakup when love lingers include prioritizing mental health and healing, irrespective of the breakup’s intensity. Whether your breakup is a gentle rain or a tempest, love’s residue remains. Amidst the wreckage, there’s an opportunity for resilience and transformation. So, wrap yourself in the warmth of self-care, paint your emotions on the canvas of art, and let this article, HOW TO DEAL WITH A BREAKUP WHEN YOU STILL LOVE THEM, be the soothing balm for your wounded heart.

1. Face front and cut off all communication

The reality is dawning on you already, and being a beautiful soul, you must navigate through the tumultuous seas of heartbreak. First things first, snip those lines of communication. It might sting like a paper cut, but this is essential for your well-being.

There’s no need to know where they’re brunching or who they’re laughing with. Cut the ties, my friend. It’s your time to shine, and their chapter no longer fits into your story. The tempting notion of friendship post-breakup Let’s be real – it’s like trying to bake a cake without flour. Sweetie, being friends sounds wonderful in theory, but reality has a different recipe. Right now, it’s like protecting your heart, and it’s okay to say “no” to their slice of life.

In the realities of How to Deal with a Breakup When You Still Love Them, the first step is to Step away from the virtual world, my dear. Let those virtual strings loosen. Remember, every like and every post are like adding salt to the wound.

Let’s focus on your heart’s healing. And forgiveness? That’s your magic wand. It’s not about erasing history; it’s about unburdening your soul. But here’s the scoop: To truly heal, make a clean break. A message only, when necessary, like sorting possessions—that’s the game plan.

Now, let’s debunk the myth of “getting over” someone. It’s not about flipping a switch; emotions aren’t light switches, after all. It’s about healing, about letting your heart breathe amidst the ache. Love doesn’t vanish, darling, but it does evolve.

So, as you unfurl your wings and embrace the sun of new possibilities, remember that you’re not erasing love. You’re giving it room to grow and shine alongside the new chapters you’re about to write. You’re not letting go of love; you’re letting in the light of new beginnings.

Yes, it can be crushing to be out of their lives. But now the priority is your own journey, and they don’t have a place in it. It’s time to focus on yourself and not on your ex’s social plans.

Getting over somebody doesn’t mean you don’t love them anymore or don’t care. It just means that these feelings are no longer the focus of your life, and that you allow some light in for the possibility of one day loving somebody new.

2. seek the healing space

Both hearts need tender healing. It’s a challenge to be accustomed to relying on each other, yet post-breakup, refrain from reaching out. A few weeks might mend the hurt, but don’t fret if it takes longer, especially after sharing history.

Steer clear of familiar places your ex frequents and consider unfollowing on social media, like gently closing a chapter. Space isn’t a chasm; it’s a bridge to clarity. If parting ways is the best path, this distance curbs the urge to rewind or reconnect. If unsure, time apart lets emotions settle, guiding both souls to clarity and new decisions. Love and heal gently.

3. Take a few days to really grieve.

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Allow the tears, dear heart. Breakups warrant a sacred space for processing emotions, especially when love still lingers. No need for a brave facade; let yourself weep, seek comfort in melodies of heartbreak, and reach out to friends.

Pain, a universal visitor, is not to be dodged. Like our primal instincts, emotions demand attention. A breakup isn’t just a goodbye; it’s a heart’s response to a missing piece.

Let the pain in; embrace its presence. Therapists may label it, but it’s not an ailment; it’s a human response to the absence of a cherished bond. Your heart’s melody is composed of these very chords. Don’t shun this orchestra of emotions; listen, accept and honor them. It’s the natural rhythm of healing.

And love, oh, sweet love, it can’t be switched off like a light. In your world, echoes of your ex may reverberate, creating a symphony of memories. Your core might feel like a void, like a compass gone astray. In this whirlwind, remember that these emotions aren’t to be suppressed. They are the colors of your heart’s canvas, painting a portrait of love’s journey.

4. Respect your partner’s emotions with empathy and tenderness

Gently release the urge to overanalyze when navigating the realms of a breakup while love still thrives. Psychologist Sarah Schewitz, PsyD., aptly puts it: “Love and incompatibility can coexist; it’s a part of life. Don’t blame yourself for not making it work.” While pondering the why’s and how’s of the breakup is valid, don’t let it consume you. Reflect, but don’t obsess.

Unravel the threads: who initiated the split? Was it a joint decision or one-sided? The details matter yet fixating on them isn’t the remedy. If the relationship felt salvageable from your end but not theirs, it’s a tough pill to swallow.

Respect their stance, even if yearning to reconcile tugs at your heart. Understand that you can’t cling to hope as a lifeline to move on, and their feelings must be acknowledged before any potential change.

Embrace the bittersweet truth that compatibility and love don’t always walk hand in hand. It’s a heartache we all navigate—loving fiercely but realizing life’s pathways might not align. Accepting that this love story won’t flourish is perhaps the most challenging yet authentic journey.

5. Understand the natural rebounce

Dear soul, don’t fret if your heart’s compass wavers between love and moments of disdain for your ex. Emotions are like stars; they are not bound by linear paths. Amidst the rollercoaster, remember that these mixed feelings are but echoes of a once profound connection. No need for self-blame; those emotions are valid souvenirs of your journey.

Take a moment to whisper to yourself that it’s not a flaw. Feeling love still resonating is a testament to your humanity, your capacity to cherish and be cherished. Yet, understand that this love wears a new hue, an evolved shade. It’s not possessive romantic love, but a mature sentiment of acceptance and reminiscence.

Imagine it as the affection you hold for a cherished place you’ve visited. That chapter was beautiful, yet you’re ready for new stories and new horizons. It’s not about erasing love; it’s about embracing its transformation. So, cherish the love you feel, let nostalgia weave its threads, and step forward into the embrace of new adventures.

6.Look after yourself, dear one

Nurture yourself, inside and out. The first few days’ post-breakup might find you nestled in bed, and that’s okay. Yet, as the sun peeks through, a journey of self-care awaits. Embrace a steady sleep rhythm, savor nourishing meals, and dance with exercise. This pilgrimage brings strength, empowerment, and a gentle salve for your heartache.

Savor moments of solace—a massage’s tender touch, the embrace of a comforting bath, or laughter shared over a cherished meal. Speak affirmations like “I am enough,” painting your spirit with love’s hues. Step into nature’s embrace and let the outdoors mend your spirit.

Amidst the turmoil of lingering love, remember that cherishing your ex doesn’t dim the light that is you. Unveil mornings with purpose and honor your body through mindful choices. Your vessel is unique, irreplaceable—a treasure to be cherished.

Give yourself the grace to pause, bask in the sunlight’s warmth, and tend to your essence. You are worthy of care, dear one.

7. Talk to those who hold a special place within your heart

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Lean on those who hold your heart close. Amidst the echoes of a significant bond’s departure, you don’t have to journey alone. Seek solace in the embrace of a caring friend, a trusted family member, or even a compassionate coworker.

Share the reasons that brought you to this juncture, the reasons for the parting, yet let them glimpse the enduring care that still resides within. These conversations not only help unravel the tangle of emotions but also provide fresh viewpoints that soothe.

If voicing your thoughts feels daunting, try the ink and paper embrace of journaling. Pour your heart out, let your emotions flow, and free them from the cage of silence.

Unsure about opening up? Embrace the warmth of local support groups or reach out to a therapist’s guiding hand. Remember, dear soul, that many of us mistakenly believe in facing turmoil alone, with blinds drawn and distractions embraced. Yet, the presence of those who care can be a beacon of change.

Their comforting presence, even if conversations are few, serves as a reminder that solitude doesn’t have to be your sole companion. Your journey continues, and better days await. Embrace the truth that your pain is not an invention; it can be understood by any heart and reach out to those who form your inner circle.

8. Engage yourself in your hobbies.

Allow yourself a breather as you navigate the aftermath of a breakup; reducing work or school hours is completely okay. In due time, gently reintegrate into a nourishing routine. While sadness might linger, taking steps forward is key.

Avoid masking your emotions with substances or fleeting connections. Such paths hinder healing and your journey forward.

Embrace activities that spark joy and fill your days. Amid the spaces left by the past, engage in pursuits that light up your soul. Watch that movie you’ve been eyeing, lose yourself in a captivating book, explore new horizons, or embark on a spontaneous journey.

When the time is ripe, be open to making new connections. Embark on dates even if another serious relationship isn’t on the horizon. Discover what the world offers as you stride ahead on your path of renewal.

9.Analyze and Reflect on the Past relationship

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Dearest, relationships are woven from two threads: tangible reality and enchanting fantasies. In the aftermath of a breakup, it’s the fantasy that often lingers, obscuring the true nature of the bond.

When you reminisce about a flawless past and yearn to rekindle it, remember that you’re embracing a fanciful version, not an objective reality. Perfection doesn’t yield endings. Reflecting on the relationship, don’t just pick the rosy moments; acknowledge the thorns too.

Don’t let pain and responsible actions be lost in the shadow of exaggerated positivity. To nurture your well-being, engage in genuine analysis. Yes, there were joys, but undeniable sorrows too. This holistic view paints a truer portrait of your journey.

Embrace the power of journaling; put your thoughts on paper. Scribble the hues of your relationship—the vibrant and the muted. This documentation fosters an authentic perception, guarding against rose-tinted memories. As you embrace this introspective process, remember that it’s your key to liberation. A path to understanding, healing, and moving forward.

10. Look for the good in being single

Cherish your newfound independence, dear soul. While love for your ex persists, don’t overlook the joys of an unattached life. Jot down a roster of experiences previously hindered by the relationship. Revisit this list during moments of melancholy.

In your solo journey, revel in the freedom to:

  • Indulge in any culinary whim.
  • Set your sleep schedule.
  • Select entertainment preferences.
  • Embark on spontaneous travels.
  • Reconnect with loved ones at will.
  • Express your tidiness inclination (or lack thereof)

This roster unveils the tapestry of autonomy unfurled before you. Amidst lingering affection, savor the liberation that unfettered existence brings.

11. Discover the wisdom nestled within the breakup

Amidst the ache, there’s a profound lesson awaiting your embrace. Reflect on the tapestry of your past, adorned with threads of lessons and growth. Delve into the depths of introspection, dear soul, and unearth the gems of understanding from the fragments of a relationship’s end.

Consider the intricacies that shaped your journey: values that diverged, aspirations that led separate ways, and the tapestry of communication that sometimes unraveled. Gently unravel the tendrils of the past, for within them lie the seeds of transformation.

Every fracture holds an opportunity for growth, a chance to uncover insights about yourself, relationships, and the intricate dance of two souls. Pause, reflect, and extract the lessons this experience bears.

Perhaps it’s a revelation about your needs and boundaries, a recognition of patterns that demand transformation, or an understanding of what truly kindles your spirit. Embrace the journey of self-discovery that unfolds when love’s journey takes an unexpected turn.

Seek knowledge; let your soul be nourished by the wisdom of books, podcasts, and the tender guidance of a therapist’s words. Embrace this voyage of self-discovery—the journey to mend your wings and rise anew.

12. Forgive the past

In the aftermath of a breakup, a tempest of regrets and resentments often swirls within. It’s natural to replay scenarios and question choices, caught between the pull of “what ifs” and the sting of perceived wrongs.

Regret and anger entwine, especially when betrayal lingers in the shadows. Each recollection becomes a pendulum, swinging between remorse and fury, trapping you in a cycle of helplessness and regret. Love for your ex may lead you to magnify their virtues while scrutinizing your own faults.

Yet the path to liberation doesn’t entail erasing the past; it beckons forgiveness. To forge this path, speak your truths honestly—pen them in a journal or whisper them to your heart. Extend forgiveness not only to your ex but to your own actions as well.

This isn’t fragility; it’s a testament to your resilience and maturity. Forgiveness isn’t a one-time act; it’s a journey. Memories may stir emotions anew, but your strength lies in revisiting these moments without the shackles of regret or resentment. In forgiving, you unshackle your heart, allowing it to breathe, to mend, and, in time, to love anew.

13. keep distance from the past

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When I suggest avoiding reminders, I don’t mean discarding them all. Keeping a few mementos of cherished moments is natural—a photo, a gift, a token of affection.

However, instead of having them in plain sight, tuck them away. Store these keepsakes as if they were treasures in a hidden chest, to be revisited on a distant rainy day. Think of them as a time capsule, not a tie to a bygone relationship.

This isn’t about clinging to the past; it’s about acknowledging the chapters that once held meaning. These reminders shouldn’t dominate your space. In fact, if feasible, a change of environment, even moving to a new dwelling, can be a powerful strategy to help untangle emotions from a love you can’t hold onto.

14. Keep the details private and avoid media-casting

Maintaining privacy is crucial during this delicate phase. Navigating a breakup when lingering feelings remain can attract attention from concerned friends and acquaintances. While some explanations might be shared in agreement with your ex, it’s wise to tread lightly on specifics.

Remember, your private life is just that—private. Oversharing can anchor the breakup in your thoughts and open a forum for constant scrutiny. Shield the details from public discussion as much as possible. As Crystal Raypole wisely suggests, mutual friends’ inquiries can be met without delving into intricate explanations.

Social media isn’t a balm for heartache. In fact, it’s a minefield of triggers. The temptation to follow your ex’s activities or connections can exacerbate pain. My strong recommendation: resist this urge. Social media can prolong the healing process. Consider a digital detox for at least a few weeks after the breakup.

If that’s not feasible, distance yourself from anything related to your ex. Remember, avoid unnecessary contact unless it’s essential for practical matters. Protecting your mental and emotional well-being is your top priority.

15.Improve your self perception, self-esteem and inward greatness

Dismiss the shadows of self-doubt that may sneak in post-breakup. It’s natural for flaws to take center stage after a relationship’s end, but don’t lend an ear to that critical inner voice. Remember, your worth is beyond measure, even if the relationship didn’t flourish.

Forge a new habit: swap those negative whispers with gentle affirmations about yourself. Remind yourself that you deserve respect and love of a certain kind. If your ex couldn’t provide that, perhaps they were never meant to hold that place in your life.

For instance, when the thought “I’ll be alone forever” intrudes, replace it with “I possess wit and wisdom, and someday, the right person will recognize and cherish that.” If need be, jot down your finest qualities, creating a lifeline of positivity to turn to when confidence falters. In your heart’s mirror, reflect the truth of your incredible qualities, and watch as the radiance of self-assurance grows brighter.

16.Tear your tears and move on with reality

After a few weeks, reacquainting yourself with life becomes necessary. The pang of grief from the relationship’s end might persist, yet forging ahead is crucial. Amidst the storm of emotions, finding ways to navigate life’s currents is a vital step.

Allocate a specific time each day to embrace the depth of your feelings. Perhaps, in the solace of the shower, grant yourself 10 minutes to release tears, but as you step out, lift your head high and proceed with the day’s tasks.

This approach allows room for emotional healing while ensuring the breakup doesn’t cast a shadow over your professional commitments, parental duties, or other obligations. By granting yourself this sacred space, you’re permitting the waves of emotion to wash over you, acknowledging their presence.

Yet, you’re also affirming your strength to move forward. In the midst of heartache, this practice empowers you to maintain your balance. One of the most valuable pieces of advice for overcoming a breakup, even when love lingers, is to peel away the layers of fantasy. It’s the act of confronting reality that ultimately paves the way for genuine healing and growth.

17. Embark on the journey of rediscovering friendship

The journey of friendship is a path that may require patience but is imbued with hope. Reaching out becomes an option when the possibility of casual companionship sparkles on the horizon. Sometimes, it takes months of cherished absence before your heart regains its strength.

Yet, if the flame of affection for this special person still burns, you might find it worthwhile to rekindle a different kind of bond. Wait until your heart feels ready, then embark on an open-hearted conversation about the prospect.

With the passage of time, occasional text messages might become like shared secrets, and warm exchanges in public spaces might rekindle the magic of companionship without the sting of the past.

Remember, they may not assume the role of your closest confidant, but that’s okay. Sometimes, a hint of distance adds a layer of enchantment to a relationship that has gracefully transformed. Love finds its way in many forms, and in time, you’ll discover a new harmony in being friends, sharing smiles, and embracing life’s journey side by side.

18. Consider the idea of rekindling your relationship if circumstances have evolved

Ensure that there’s a clear understanding of the transformations that will mark this new phase. Despite the enduring feelings held by both, the relationship’s success hinges on addressing past issues.

For instance, suppose the breakup occurred due to conflicting desires about having children, finances, house chores, respect, and coordination. In such a scenario, reuniting should only be considered if one of you has genuinely shifted your stance.

Similarly, if the separation stemmed from a lack of commitment from your ex-partner, their commitment to now embrace a serious relationship must be substantiated. This time, actions should speak louder than words.

Conclusively, Letting go of a former partner whom you still hold affection for is crucial for your emotional well-being. This journey will consist of both favorable and challenging moments. The key is to consistently reassure yourself that each day brings improvement. You’re gradually leaving behind what was, releasing emotional burdens, and emerging from it all as a more resilient and healthier individual.

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